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Firsts: PG-13, SPN, 2/?

 Title: Firsts

Author: daymarket 

Pairing: Dean/Cas

Rating: PG-13 (eventual R, I think)

Notes: AU robot!fic. Sequel to "I, Castiel," which is a fic where angels and demons are robots. Cas is Dean's robot and trying to figure out what the hell it means to be human. This is a little less philosophical and more fluff, I think. I solemnly swear that the next chapter won't take as long! Promise~

Summary: Life after the “operation” was measured in a series of firsts.

X

The First Time Cas Expressed Emotion

Dean was rather pleased with his cunning, if he did say so himself. Ellen’s food improved considerably under Cas’ ministrations, the number of customers to the Roadhouse increased as a result, and Cas loosened up as well. Well, maybe ‘loosened’ wasn’t exactly the right word: he still had that intense frown between his eyebrows and grilled burgers like they had personally offended him, but he was more willing to venture out to other places as well.

His favorite place was still the Roadhouse, though, and now that it had an actual menu going, it was a good place for dinner as well. More often than not, Dean would grab a bite there whenever he picked Cas up, swapping news with Ellen as he did. Jo would be coming back for Christmas, apparently, which pleased Ellen so much that she started putting up decorations for the first time that Dean could remember. Cas helped, although it was clear that he regarded it all as a rather puzzling human tradition. And inevitably, Dean was roped into it as well.

“Mistletoe, Ellen, seriously?” Dean hooted, pulling the white flowers out of their shrink-wrapped bag. “Looking for a kiss, are we?”

“Hush up, or I’ll kiss you and you’ll be sorry,” Ellen said absently as she fiddled with a length of tinsel over the bar. “Just put that wherever.”

“Mistletoe,” Cas said, studying the plant critically. “A poisonous, parasitic plant. Derived from a Germanic word that means ‘urine’ because mistletoes use the droppings of the mistle thrush as fertilizer.”

Dean blinked. “Wow. Way to rain on the parade, Cas.”

Cas opened his mouth, most likely to comment on the nonexistence of parades or rain, and Dean waved a hand at him. “Figure of speech, man. Well, I don’t know what the dictionary in your head says, man, but this is the kissing plant of Christmas.”

“Kissing plant?” Cas frowned. “I see no lips.”

Dean laughed. “No, you’re supposed to kiss other people when you’re under it. You know. It’s an excuse for horny guys to bang on their dates, I guess. Want to try it out?” He held out the plant to Cas.

Cas reached out for it, his hand brushing Dean’s as he did so. Cas glanced briefly at the mistletoe and then at Dean’s face, his eyes latching on with an unnerving intensity. Dean felt heat sweep up his cheeks as he became aware of the faux pas (intentional or not) that he had just made: he hadn’t been thinking that way at all when he’d made his offer. Seriously. But now that Cas was looking at him…

“Hey, Ellen!”

Dean jumped as the door to the Roadhouse swung open, revealing a red-cheeked Sam in the doorway. “Sam!” Ellen said, turning around. “You’re early. We don’t open for another thirty minutes.”

“Oh, really? Crap.” Sam glanced at his watch. “I didn’t notice. I got off early from work today and I totally forgot. Should I go?”

“It’s fine,” Ellen said. “I’ll even feed you if you help put up decorations. There’s supposed to be a tree coming in any time now, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to put up all the decorations myself.”

“Really?” Sam said, looking around him with a bemused air. His eyes fell on Dean, and he brightened up. “Hey!”

“Hey there, Sam,” Dean said, turning away from Cas with relief. “What brings your giant Sasquatch ass in here, anyway?”

“Oh, you know. Jess’ got a case today so she’ll be working late, and I don’t feel like putting up with Ruby’s pouts alone. What’re you doing here?”

“Picking up Cas,” Dean said, leaning against the counter.

“Cas?” Sam said. “Wasn’t he broken or something?”

“Yeah, but he’s fixed now,” Dean said with a nonchalant grin. “And he’s working here at Ellen’s. Best damn pie you’ve ever tasted, man. Hey, Cas!”

“Yes, Dean?” Cas asked.

“When’s the pie going to be ready?”

Cas gave him a look, which Dean returned with his best charming grin. “Perhaps fifteen minutes,” Cas said as he set the mistletoe down onto the counter. “I’ll get started now.”

“You do that,” Dean said. He turned back to Sam. “Seriously, man, I’m going to get fat from all the amazing stuff he makes.”

“You’re already fat, Dean,” Sam said, but he looked distracted. “Wait. You mean that Cas cooks here in his spare time? But I thought you had to work.”

“I do,” Dean said agreeably. “I drop him off here and he does his stuff, I do mine, and we meet up here at night.”

“So he’s here without you around?”

Dean paused. “Well, yeah. Unless you know a way that I can be in two places at once.”

“Huh,” Sam said with a frown. “That’s…unusual.” He cleared his throat.

Dean sighed. “Yeah, yeah, I know. Personal bots, blah blah blah.”

“It’s not a bad thing, it’s just weird,” Sam protested. “Who does he take his cues from if you’re not around?” He looked at Cas, his forehead wrinkling. “I thought they went into hibernate mode if their owners weren’t there.”

A chill crept up Dean’s spine at the error he’d made, and his mind scrambled to fix it. “Well, uh,” Dean said. “I, uh…I transfer ownership protocols to Ellen. For, you know, whenever Cas is here. So, yeah.”

Ellen, fortunately, was busy wrestling with yards of white tinsel, and Dean pitched his voice low enough that hopefully she didn’t catch him in the lie. Sam accepted his story with a small frown, not questioning further. “Okay, then,” Sam said, though he did pull a rather epic bitchface. “As long as you’re not going to turn into some psycho technorist.”

“Technorist?” Dean snorted. “You mean those nutjobs who believe in robotic domination? Man, when would I find the time?”

“Hey, you have to admit it’s catchy,” Sam laughed. His eyes swept over Cas once more before thankfully changing the subject. “So, Ellen,” Sam said, leaning back against the counter. “What’s the occasion?”

“Do I need an occasion to spread Christmas cheer?” Ellen asked caustically, looking up. “Can’t I just be warm and fuzzy for once?”

“Aw, come on, Ellen, you’re a prickly hedgehog and we love you for it,” Dean joined in, glad to have a change of subject.

“Don’t get smart on me, Winchester,” Ellen warned.

“Which one? There’s two of us and we’re both bigger than you.”

Ellen turned around and cocked an eyebrow at him. “True. Two fine strapping young men, and here I’m just an old lady. Want to take me on?”

Dean winced. “I just know you’ve got a shotgun somewhere ready to blow my balls off, don’t you?”

“Damn straight,” Ellen said. She stood back and examined her work critically: the Christmas tree in the corner looked…well, pretty damned Christmas-y, complete with gold and white tinsel and more decorations than Dean could count. Sam gave an impressed whistle, and Dean found himself throwing Cas a wry grin. Cas tilted his head and looked back at him, evidently puzzled.

“It’s Christmas,” Dean explained.

“A winter holiday,” Cas said. “Ostensibly Christian, but with pagan roots.”

“Well, yeah,” Dean said, amused. “But I think the history’s something for weirdos like Sam to geek out over. Well, you’re a nerd, I guess, so this would be the kind of thing you’d go nuts over, huh?”

Sam snorted and slid down onto a bar stool. “Yeah, well, I figured you’d want an intelligent bot. You need some actual conversation in your life. So how’s he working, Dean? Looks like you’re pretty satisfied.”

“Yep,” Dean said, sitting on the stool next to Sam. “You could say that.”

“Well, good,” Sam said with a sigh. “Glad that fancy technology’s working out for somebody. Ruby’s throwing a major tantrum lately.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. Well, she’s not my problem anymore. I’ve already sold her to the realtors’, and the auction house can figure the details out.”

“Auction?” Cas said, coming over to join them. Dean could see Sam frown slightly with surprise at Cas’ unusual initiative, and Dean made a note to have a Talk with Cas. “What do you mean?”

“Well, uh…” Sam glanced briefly at Dean before turning back to Cas. “I’ve already found a realtor who’s willing to take her on, and Ruby’s going to the warehouse next week. I think the auction’s a day after that, but I’m not sure.”

“Warehouse,” Cas said, and it was kind of astonishing how ominous a single word could sound.

“Well, I mean, we’ve had some good times, but you can’t stick with your old toys forever, right?” Sam said with a puzzled frown. “Ruby’s not what I need anymore, now that I’ve found Jess.”

Dean took a moment to appreciate how much his viewpoint had changed—in the Before Cas stage, he would have thought this perfectly normal; when bots got outdated, you chucked them; didn’t want them, you recycled them or sold them off for a decent price. Now, though, as Cas looked decidedly stormy, Dean could sort of understand where the frown on Cas’ face was coming from. Still, it wouldn’t do for him to say something un-bot-like in front of Sam. “Yeah?” Dean said hastily before Cas could speak up. “I know a few guys who might be interested. You have the realtor’s name?”

“Uh, yeah,” Sam said, fumbling in his coat for his wallet. “It’s, uh…” he pulled out a card. “Bela Talbot. I’ll give you her number if you want.”

“She hot?” Dean said in an attempt to derail the conversation, trying on his best flirting grin for size. Sam snorted and passed the card to him. “Oh, come on, man. It’s not like I’m getting any.

“Yeah, because you’re a prude,” Sam said, shaking his head. “She’s pretty good-looking, I guess. Not my style, though, and anyway, Jess would murder me if I went out with someone else.”

“Dude, she’s got you by the short-and-curlies,” Dean said as he copied down the number. “My Sammy’s a tamed man.”

“My roaming days are behind me,” Sam agreed with a grin. “I’m going on the straight and narrow now.”

Ellen rapped the counter briskly, stopping Dean before he could reply with a similarly witty retort. “We’re opening in three two one,” she said. “You boys want to order now, or what? This place is going to get pretty crowded later on.”

“Uh, sure,” Sam said, looking at the menu above the counter. “I’ll have a…whoa, you guys really revved up the menu, huh? Pastas and steaks?”

“I told you he was a good cook,” Dean said, grinning at Cas. Without really thinking about it, he reached out in an attempt to rub the frown on Cas’ cheek away. “Hey, man. Lighten up.”

Cas didn’t stop frowning, but he did turn slightly into Dean’s palm. His eyes fluttered a little, and Dean couldn’t help but notice the movement of his eyelashes. He swallowed hard and pulled his palm away as if burned. “Um. A double cheeseburger, Cas? Please?”

“And I’ll have the salad,” Sam said, looking at Dean with a questioning look. He’d seen their little exchange, evidently. Dean flapped a hand impatiently at him as Cas moved away to the grill and stove. Dean took refuge in his beer bottle, taking his time swallowing every drop.

“What?” Dean said when he finally surfaced. “Don’t keep it all in, Sam, that’s unhealthy.”

“Nothing,” Sam said innocently.

Dean pinned him with a flat stare until Sam broke out into laughter. “Dude. You’re totally getting some, aren’t you?” Sam said, punching him in the shoulder. “No need to act coy, man.”

“I am not,” Dean said with a shake of his head. “Trust me, Cas is still hymenated like there’s no tomorrow. Me, I’m living the celibate life. Next thing you know, I’m going to shave my head and join the fucking monastery.”

“You, a monk?” Sam said as he opened his own beer. “Perish the thought.”

“Yeah, whatever. So says the guy who’s getting regular sex. From a human chick. Without having to pay her. That’s a pretty awesome setup you’ve got going.”

“Commitment,” Sam sighed. “There are some perks to it, I guess, or people wouldn’t be doing it.”

“So when’s the wedding?” Dean asked, anticipating the flustered grin on Sam’s face. It appeared right on cue, and Dean had to hide a small smirk of triumph. “Should I be planning the bachelor party?”

“Dean!” Sam said.

“No, just kidding,” Dean said, relaxing as the conversation fell into familiar territory. He could handle this—back and forth between him and Sam, teasing like they’d done all their lives. And the fewer uncomfortable questions there were, the better.

X

Sam left the Roadhouse after an hour or so, pleading exhaustion and early work the next day. Dean stayed until closing time, watching the way Cas juggled eight different orders at any given time without burning or ruining the food. Every movement was careful and economical, and Dean tried really, really damn hard not fixate on Cas’ hands. In an effort to distract himself, he accepted a pool invitation from a couple of guys. It didn’t seem to be a good night, though, as he kept on missing for some reason.

Cas took a few minutes after closing time to help Ellen tidy up the bar, but he joined Dean in the Impala shortly after that. Dean put in some hard pounding rock to wake himself up for the drive home. “That’s more like it,” he said, grinning as the familiar strains of Traveling Riverside Blues blasted through the stereo.

Cas didn’t say anything. When Dean looked up at him, Cas’ face was turned away towards the direction of the window. Dean nudged Cas’ arm with his own. “Good music, huh?”

Cas gave a small grunt in response. Dean frowned slightly at the lack of response. “Cas?” he said. “You okay?”

“I’m fine,” Cas said curtly.

“You don’t sound fine.”

“I assure you that I am adequate,” Cas said, his tone clearly indicating that further question would be met by instant death.

Dean brushed it aside. “Yeah, right. What’s wrong? Shit, man, I thought tonight was—”

“When is your brother getting married?”

The abrupt non sequitur gave Dean pause, and he looked hard at Cas for a moment. “You do know that I was kidding, right? I’m pretty sure that Sam’s not planning to tie the knot anytime soon. Hell, they’ve only been dating for what, half a year?” He closed his eyes, making the mental jumps. “Sam, Jess, marriage—oh. Shit. This is about Ruby, isn’t it?”

Cas’ silence was all the confirmation he needed.

“Dammit,” Dean said with a sigh. “Look, Cas. Ruby’s not…she’s not…look, I’m sure that Sam will find the perfect owner for her. Or I mean, the Talbot chick will. Realtors want to make a great profit, after all, they’re not going to sell them to just any hack off the street.”

“Of course,” Cas said, his voice flat.

“Yeah, I know you’re upset, but man, you can’t just…look, Sam’s not doing anything wrong. It’s not like Ruby is like you either, you know?”

“I understand, Dean. You don’t have to say anything else.”

“Fuck,” Dean said, using his inner Cas-to-English dictionary to extract the anger behind the calm tone. “Goddamn it, Cas. What do you want me to do?”

“Nothing,” Cas said.

“You can’t—Cas, come on! You can’t act like this every time a bot gets sold. I get it, all right? You feel indignant on the behalf of your fellow bots and you want to lead a revolution. But man, that’s the kind of stuff put forth by those weird technological terrorists who think that robots should rule the world. But that’s insane; technorists are a bunch of bullshit. You’re different, Cas, but that’s because of what Ash did—”

“When you made me what I am,” Cas interrupted him, “you changed me. I’m different because of you.”

“Your point being?” Dean demanded, flustered at being thrown off track.

“What do you want?” Cas asked simply, turning to look at Dean for the first time. He tilted his head slightly, his gaze intensifying; Dean focused hard on the road to get away from the look. “Do you want me to smile and say yes, everything’s fine? Do you want me to acquiesce and take the viewpoint of the masses? Unfortunately, you’ve missed that opportunity, Dean, when you brought me to Ash’s.”

“What’re you trying to say?” Dean demanded. “Cas, I know you’re all about bot rights, but—”

“I understand that I’m being unreasonable,” Cas said coldly. “And that I shouldn’t expect all technology to be as…different…as I am. In fact, I don’t even like Ruby, from what little I’ve seen of her. But it’s the principle of the matter, Dean, that we can be discarded like used toys.”

“She’s not being discarded, dammit. She’s going onto someone else.”

“Out of her own free will? Wait, I forgot. Bots don’t have free will.” There was actual sarcasm in Cas’ voice now.

Dean winced at the caustic tone, but he forged on nonetheless. “I get it, Cas. I get that you want your fellow bots to rise up and be free. But that’s not the way the world works.” He closed his eyes briefly as Cas said nothing. “Fuck. This…Cas. Come on. I’m trying, all right?”

There was silence for a long moment. Dean pulled into the parking lot of his garage and turned off the ignition, weighing the keys in his hand for a long moment as he waited for a response.

“When will you change your mind, then?” Cas said finally, his voice inflectionless. Dean looked at him sharply, his brow furrowing slightly in confusion.

“Change my mind about what?” Dean said slowly.

“About this.” Cas gave a small half-shrug, gesturing at himself. “Choice is a pernicious thing.”

“About…” Dean shook his head. “Not getting, it Cas.”

“When should I anticipate the realtors’ visit?”

Dean stared. “You think I’m gonna—what the hell, Cas! No. No! That’s never going to happen, man.”

“I doubt Sam anticipated the day that he would sell Ruby, either,” Cas said, sounding tired.

“Fuck it, Cas. No. Just—no.” He blew out a deep breath. “God, I hate this.”

Cas turned to look him in the eye, and Dean found himself wanting to reach out and loosen the hard knot in Cas’ jaw. He cleared his throat and interlaced his fingers together to try to suppress the temptation. They sat in silence for a moment, neither of them making a move to get out of the car.

“Look,” Dean said finally, trying for a more conciliatory tone. “What do you want me to do about it, Cas? I can tell Sam not to sell, but he hasn’t listened to me since he was a foot shorter than me. Besides, Ruby’s already gone out to the realtors’, and I don’t know what it takes to get her back.”

When Cas didn’t say anything, Dean said fiercely, “Dammit, Cas. Stop ignoring me.”

“I think,” Cas said quietly, “that I know how it feels now.”

“Know what?” Dean said, thrown off by this random comment, as he so often was.

Cas sighed, the fingers of his free hand wrapping around the metal bracelet on his wrist. It was a humanlike, almost unconscious gesture. “What it’s like to be angry.”

Dean swallowed hard. “That’s not good for your blood pressure, man,” he joked weakly.

“I don’t think it’s good for anything,” Cas said bleakly. He turned his gaze to stare out the windshield. “It doesn’t change anything.”

“That’s not true,” Dean said. Trying to lighten the mood, he added, “Hell, people can do all sorts of shit when they’re pissed. Hormones and adrenaline for the win, man.”

“Most of this ‘shit’ is undoubtedly illegal,” Cas said dryly.

“Well, yeah,” Dean admitted. “But I mean, if you use it productively, you can overthrow governments, man.”

“I thought you were against technorist activites?” Cas asked.

“Uh…yeah. You know, on principle? Totally against overthrowing governments and vandalism in general,” Dean said. He shook his head, lifting a hand up to rub at his eyes. “To be honest, I don’t know if I could stand the excitement.”

Cas was quiet for a long moment; when Dean looked at him, Cas was apparently intent on burning a hole in the windshield with his gaze. “I don’t know if I like this,” he said finally.

“I don’t like it either, man, but Ruby—” Dean began.

“No,” Cas interrupted, shaking his head. “I mean…” he took a deep breath. “Emotion. I don’t know if I…I don’t…it’s not right. It’s not logical.” He looked down, where his hands had curled into fists; with what seemed like a visible effort, Cas straightened them out and placed his palms flat on the dashboard. “I’ve never felt this before,” he said.

“Never?” Dean asked.

“Never.”

Dean stared at him for a moment, noting the tense lines in Cas’ body. Fuck the inner debate, he thought, and reached out to wrap his hand around Cas’ arm. Cas looked at him sharply but didn’t move away from the touch, which Dean counted as a minor victory.

“I’m sorry,” Dean said softly, feeling the hard tension under his hand as he ran his fingers up and down Cas’ arm. Yeah, Cas was a bot. He was mechanical and made out of synth-tissue, and the rigidity under Dean’s touch was nothing more than a bunch of electrical signals put out by a fake brain. But fuck it all, it sure felt real.

“I shouldn’t have changed you, huh?” Dean murmured at last.

Cas sighed. “I don’t know,” he said. “The intensity is unsettling.” He paused as if prepared to shape another word, then shook his head and closed his mouth.

“What?” Dean asked, looking up at Cas. He swallowed hard. It was a dumb time to be noticing it, but Cas did have really blue eyes. He jumped slightly as those eyes turned away from their focus on the windshield and glanced down to meet his gaze.

The moment seemed to stretch endlessly. Dean felt his heartbeat pound hard in his ears, and it seemed to fill the silence. In a sudden moment of clarity, he knew exactly what was going to happen next, and he closed his eyes as he waited for the universe to restart.

Cas leaned forward, closing the last few inches between them. A soft breath was the only warning Dean had, and then Cas was kissing him, the movement gentle and chaste. Dean felt heat blaze along his spine at the simple touch, gasping with protest as Cas pulled away.

He stared dumbly at Cas for a moment, his mind spinning. “Cas,” he said, groping for words. “I—”

That seemed to be all Dean could handle, all articulation slipping from his mind. As the moment stretched on, Cas seemed to withdraw slightly, the light in his eyes fading. He pulled away slightly and sat up straighter in his seat. “I apologize,” he said stiffly. “I understand that you are opposed to—”

“No!” Dean said, and the word came out much louder than he had expected.

Cas frowned. “I don’t understand—” he began, but Dean cut him off with another kiss. It was rushed and clumsy, but Cas responded to the awkward touch, his mouth opening slightly to grant Dean access. Dean pressed insistently against him and felt Cas’ hands reach up to wrap around him in a tight, unbreakable hold.

It seemed to last forever, and yes, that was perfectly fine with Dean because he never, ever wanted this moment to stop. Cas seemed to feel the same, if the hands rubbing up and down Dean’s back were any indication. Dean reached up and wrapped his fingers in Cas’ hair, feeling the soft pulse of the artificial heartbeat as Cas’ temple. Again, it was something fake made by a plastic and fiberglass brain, but in this moment Dean could believe that it was real.

He finally forced himself to pull away, his chest heaving up and down as he panted for air. “I shouldn’t,” he started, then stopped at the wild, flushed look on Cas’ face. “This is—this is real, isn’t it?” he whispered, his voice wavering. “I mean, you’re a—but not—is this real, Cas?”

His voice was a plea. He didn’t want this to stop, not ever, but he was going to fall apart if it turned out that this was just some program created by the sex industry to sell more units. Ash had changed Cas, yeah, and Dean had seen some of the results for himself. But maybe Ash had fucked up. Maybe Cas was still following some hidden program, some mandate that said, ‘Make Dean Winchester happy at all costs, because he’s your master and you have to.’ Maybe he was—

Dean felt pain blossom at the back of his skull as Cas pushed him back hard enough that his head cracked on the dashboard. “Yes,” Cas growled, his voice forbidding further argument. Cas’ eyes fixed on his, the blue flashing with a determined intensity as Cas moved to straddle him. It was an awkward fit in the front seat, but somehow Cas managed it, and the heat of Cas’ body against his drove all rationale out of Dean’s brain once more.

He wanted it, oh god, and his body responded with a hot, pounding pulse of blood to his groin. Dean groaned as Cas rubbed a palm roughly against the rising length in his jeans. “Fuck, Cas,” he bit out, his hands tugging ineffectually at Cas. The trenchcoat was in the way, and Dean pulled at the lapels in frustration. “Take this goddamn thing off,” he ordered.

Cas obliged. And it was that, really, the speed of his movements with which he obeyed. A ping traveled through Dean’s lust-filled brain, worming its way insistently through the haze. Even as Cas pulled Dean close for another kiss, the feeling of wrongness was filling his brain once more—horrible, paralyzing doubt. Three Laws. Programming. Protocols. Programming versus free will, mechanical versus biological. Real—or not?

“Stop,” he said, the word forcing its way out unbidden. “Cas, stop—”

It was a weak whisper, but Cas caught it and pulled back—and that was enough to douse the heat along Dean’s groin. Yeah, maybe it meant that Cas was a good guy and had morals. Maybe. Or maybe it was part of the safeword protocol built into every bot’s brain, to ensure the best possible experience for their owners.

Trouble was, how could you tell?

Cas’ eyes flickered once with something so painfully vulnerable that Dean wanted to take it back. But it was gone before he could speak, and Cas’ face was closed once more, his eyes revealing nothing. He rolled off Dean without another word, slid neatly back into the passenger seat, opened the door and out before Dean knew it. He didn’t slam the door either, which made it so much fucking worse.

Goddamn it.

X

Chapter 3

Comments

( 39 comments — Leave a comment )
cupidsbow
Oct. 16th, 2010 11:19 am (UTC)
I'm loving this series. Thank you so much for sharing it.
daymarket
Oct. 17th, 2010 02:19 pm (UTC)
Thanks for commenting, bb. <3 I'm hoping to post more this week.
(Deleted comment)
daymarket
Oct. 17th, 2010 02:20 pm (UTC)
Lol, yeah, Dean has morals. They ruin the sexytimes, unfortunately. :/ I hope to post more this week!
copper_on_mars
Oct. 16th, 2010 02:02 pm (UTC)
I really like this series, 'can't wait for more.
daymarket
Oct. 17th, 2010 02:22 pm (UTC)
Thanks! *hugs* I hope to post more this week. Er, if my brain permits.
bitsofbrits
Oct. 16th, 2010 04:17 pm (UTC)
So thoroughly addicted to this series. Love it.
daymarket
Oct. 17th, 2010 02:24 pm (UTC)
Thanks so much! And hoo boy, your icon. *licks screen* ;D
kundello
Oct. 16th, 2010 05:59 pm (UTC)
Oh my. I think you broke me. Poor Cas, poor Dean. Please make it right D;

Anyways, thanks for another great chapter. Totally worth the wait and I hope there will be maaaany more parts yet~
daymarket
Oct. 17th, 2010 02:25 pm (UTC)
This fic looks like it's going to be another one of those that never ends, so you may expect many many chapters. And yes, Dean and Cas have lots of angst-times ahead, too. *squishes* Thanks for commenting!
(Deleted comment)
daymarket
Oct. 17th, 2010 02:26 pm (UTC)
Hahaha, a conscience is a pain in the ass sometimes, isn't it? Still, I'll make the wait worth it, promise. (: Thanks for commenting!
laurapetri
Oct. 16th, 2010 08:41 pm (UTC)
love this series so much
daymarket
Oct. 17th, 2010 02:26 pm (UTC)
Aww, thanks, bb! *hugs*
mulder200
Oct. 17th, 2010 02:30 am (UTC)
Oh Dean! You really do know how to spoil a good thing don't you?

Poor guy is just so confused.
daymarket
Oct. 17th, 2010 02:27 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I know. But that's part of the annoying part of being a decent guy--or at least, having a chronically different viewpoint from his peers. He'll work it out eventually, I promise. (:
juanitatequila
Oct. 17th, 2010 03:11 am (UTC)
GOD DAMN DEAN, MAKE UP YOUR MIND!!!

But unffff INTENSE CHAPTER~
daymarket
Oct. 17th, 2010 02:28 pm (UTC)
*blushes* Really? Thanks! I, er, usually steer away from anything more intense than a chaste kiss so I'm glad to know that this turned out okay. Thank you!
mithrel
Oct. 17th, 2010 06:53 am (UTC)
“What’re you doing here?”

“Picking up Cas,”
In more than one sense. *snrk*

LOL, don’t mess with Ellen, Dean! She could take you and Sam both without breaking a sweat!

Bela’s the one selling Ruby? Uh-oh, looks like there’s no chance of Ash getting her now.

I really felt for Cas here, since he has been changed. He’s not a human, but he’s not an ordinary bot anymore either and he hates what’s being done to the other bots and can’t do anything about it. And Dean’s being an idiot, Cas isn’t trying to have sex with him because he’s been programmed for it, not anymore.

Incidentally, since I’ve been reading these fics I’ve read I, Robot and The Caves of Steel.
daymarket
Oct. 17th, 2010 02:32 pm (UTC)
I love me some Ellen, I really do. I raged so hard when she died. *teardrop* And Jo~~why, Kripke, why? And then the soup people came...

Well, that's the thing about doubt, I guess. Logic says that you're being an idiot, but that little voice keeps niggling away at Dean's head. Oh, the angst! ;D He'll sort it out. Eventually.

I've read I, Robot. I got the condensed version, lol. I haven't read The Caves of Steel, though. *googles*
lick_j
Oct. 17th, 2010 03:54 pm (UTC)
Damn it! I am lost for words!! So overly excited to read more on this series!! ♥
daymarket
Oct. 18th, 2010 06:51 am (UTC)
Awww, thank you! *hugs* If all goes well, I should be able to post more later this week. (:
takhallus
Oct. 17th, 2010 07:33 pm (UTC)
Gargh! Pain! Oh Dean, stop that brain from whirring away, just do it!
daymarket
Oct. 18th, 2010 06:52 am (UTC)
Having a conscience sucks, totally. *hides* But Dean has to sort these out on his own pace, and well...that leads to no sexytimes. :/

Thanks for commenting!
latvela
Oct. 18th, 2010 01:01 pm (UTC)
Another great chapter. I love it that there are no easy answers and that we're seeing both Dean and Cas's adjustment to the situation.

I also love it that Dean is really trying to do the right thing with Cas. Both of them just trying to work through this, poor boys.

Also, on a shallow note, this is hot! Even if it was interrupted :)
daymarket
Oct. 19th, 2010 09:25 am (UTC)
Yeah, I've always thought of Dean as a very moral guy (time spent in hell aside), and his 'kill-before-you-look' attitude has softened a lot in the course of the show. Or maybe it's just me? Anyway, having a conscience = no smexes. (But that'll come. Eventually. ;D)

Thanks for commenting!
waywardson_lvr
Oct. 19th, 2010 12:03 am (UTC)
Shiiiiitttt that was hoooootttttttttt - OMG!
...and written really well and articulate BUT MY BRAIN JUST SHORTCIRCUITED ON THE LAST SCENE.
daymarket
Oct. 19th, 2010 09:26 am (UTC)
*fans self* I'm blushin', seriously. XD Lol, this is the first time I've tried anything (yeah, it's kinda pathetic) past a small kiss, so this is a Big Step Forward for me. But there will be more Big Steps to come, promise! Thanks for commenting!
lenap_trap
Oct. 19th, 2010 07:04 am (UTC)
oohhh.. that was hot - the whole scene so intanse
i'm so sad about Rubies situation - and i even don't like
of course Cas will have problems..mmm...problmes - is not good word, but i can't remember proper^__^ - with understanding plus all the confusing feelings
daymarket
Oct. 19th, 2010 09:27 am (UTC)
Yep: add conflicted manpain!Dean and a falling/fallen Cas and you get angst. One of the reasons why I love my ship so damn much. (: Thank you for commenting!
lenap_trap
Oct. 20th, 2010 12:57 pm (UTC)
^__^ *kiss and hug* will be waiting for more)))
squishyturtle
Nov. 1st, 2010 08:06 pm (UTC)
YEEESSSSS, SEQUEL-Y GOODNESS
Ah, I am SO glad you've continued this - and with kissing! Yeah! Urgh, Sam is kind of a douche, but I am so madly in love with besotted!Dean and New Cas. Hope you update soon, my breath is officially bated.
daymarket
Nov. 2nd, 2010 09:23 am (UTC)
Lol, I think I promised to update about two weeks ago. *hangs head in shame* I've got about 5 pages of the next chapter, though, does that count? XD Remember to breattttheee~!
ghostyouknow27
Nov. 13th, 2010 06:14 am (UTC)
I just adore how Cas is slowly learning to live with free will and how Dean is struggling with prejudices/privileges that he wasn't aware that he had.

I'm loving this story. I'm friending you so I can track it. I hope that's okay?
daymarket
Nov. 13th, 2010 06:52 am (UTC)
Sure, knock yourself out! I'm a horribly slow updater, though, just so you know. :/ Real Life keeps getting in the way...
(Anonymous)
Nov. 13th, 2010 03:52 pm (UTC)
I write in a different fandom ... I could probably beat you on slow updates. My current WIP probably won't get a new chapter until well into December. It's, like, karma, man.

That said, I will be super psyched for your next update. Whenever it may come. :-)
kundello
Nov. 21st, 2010 10:24 am (UTC)
No pressure, no pressure, but how I wish there was more soon ;_;
daymarket
Nov. 21st, 2010 12:09 pm (UTC)
I'm a horrible, horrible person. *hangs head in shame* Well, I have no more excuses; midterms just finished for me and I swear, ohgod, to get a chapter out next week. *fervent nod* You have full permission to poke me with sharp pointy sticks if I fail to keep this promise!
kundello
Nov. 21st, 2010 02:37 pm (UTC)
Next week? Woohoo :3 Then you're forgiven, for everything. No pointy sticks this time!
cotymundi
Nov. 23rd, 2010 10:54 pm (UTC)
That's a bit of cliffhanger! Can't wait to read what happens next. I really get it that this could be a bit of residual programming and Cas is between a rock and a hard place, because doing the decent thing and stopping means that he's not a threat, but could also be just obeying orders. Good conundrum! Interestingly, I happen to feel the same way as Cas does about Ruby about people sending horses to auction, or if I'm honest, even selling them on at all. They're people to me, just in big furry bodies and have the same rights as humans. I also get very attached to my cars. Hmm....
daymarket
Nov. 27th, 2010 10:53 am (UTC)
Sorry for the late reply! Mmm, yeah. I guess Dean's attachment to Cas would be seen as an individual quirk; something that wouldn't be widespread that much in the mainstream. I mean, people fall in love with their computers/plants/whatever, but often others can't comprehend that same affection. Cas and Dean have a ways to go in defining a) what exactly their relationship IS in the first place, and b)how much of that comes from programming and how much of it is 'real' real. XD Poor boys have a while to go yet!
( 39 comments — Leave a comment )